5 Musical Stages of Grief to Help Us All (Hopefully) Manage to Get Through This Crazy Week.

5 Musical Stages of Grief to Help Us All (Hopefully) Manage to Get Through This Crazy Week.


Written by Melissa Engone

Daddy Issues

Art by Coco

It’s Friday, November 11th and it’s been less than 72 hours since Donald J. Drumpf became the 45th US President. I’m still numb and in total disbelief.

Since Tuesday, my life seems like a never ending “Challenge”. Like the ones we’ve seen spreading on the Internet. I was woken up on Wednesday early morning by the iciest of buckets. I’m in a very bad dream.

But reality is a bitch: Barack Obama, the first African-American President, a man revered by millions of people around the planet for his class and his intelligence, will hand over the power to Donald J.Drumpf, a business-man-turned-reality-TV-star who is best known for his ignorance about, well, almost everything.

As I watch my Facebook threads become flooded by the anger, sadness and denial of my friends, I find myself reading frantically through the many articles, op-eds, blogs I had received via Whatsapp, e-mail or Twitter, in search of something, anything, which could help me bring some sense to this madness. But my mind can’t — and won’t — process it. Michael Moore has perfectly explained my inability to accept this unbearable outcome: 

“Unfortunately, you are living in a bubble that comes with an adjoining echo chamber where you and your friends are convinced the American people are not going to elect an idiot for president. You alternate between being appalled at him and laughing at him because of his latest crazy comment or his embarrassingly narcissistic stance on everything because everything is about him. »

I feel like what happened on Tuesday never really took place.

Barack Obama had made us, Americans and non-Americans alike, believe that there was hope, that a better world could be built. Of course, Obama did not and could not fulfill all of our expectations. Nevertheless, he made us believe. Now with Drumpf’s election, all that is left over from Obama’s legacy went straight in the garbage.

But somehow no matter how deep is my disappointment, I want to raise above all this negativity and I absolutely refuse to live in a world where Drumpf and his like-minded Russian or Hungarian counterparts will impose their racist, misogynistic, xenophobic agendas upon us. Our ultimate common goal should be to find the strength to fight against not only The Donald, but against all the Donald J. Drumpfs of the world.

A clinical psychologist friend of mine told me about a “theory” called “the stages of grief”. You’re probably familiar with it. Based on observations compiled some 40 years ago by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross in her book On Death and Dying, she described grief as a process that could be divided in 5 stages where the griever would be expected to move through a series of stages : starting from “denial “ and eventually arriving at “acceptance,” at which time their “grief work” is complete.

The emotional tsunami this election has provoked left me in urgent need of some type of holistic mind cleansing. I feel so helpless and the only way I’ve found so far to help me get a grip of my emotions is to immerse myself in music. These five songs illustrate the evolution of my feelings surrounding the election — hopefully they’ll be helpful for you, too.











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